Brief Tidings
I haven't had the time to sit in front of a laptop to write anything. My laptop screen is still broken, but aside from that I just simply am swamped with constant, constant work that keeps me away from online chatrooms and chat groups and updates with friends. Part of me feels guilty but a bigger part of me feels miffed. We weren't supposed to be constantly accessible anyways, right? Why should I feel guilty for working and living all the time?
My saga with salt bread has mostly ended after six or seven (haha) months of near-constant experimentation. I've never used a commercial deck oven prior to this year so I'd say a majority of my time was actually spent figuring out basic deck oven thermodynamics. Only a portion was spent tweaking the recipe, the butter rolling technique, the hydration (from 73% all the way down to 64% and then up again once I understood the fundamentals a tiny bit better).
The other day we went to Kineruku to drop off some coffee. My last visit there was about nine or ten years ago, and I was startled at how little had changed. That day it somehow felt more crowded — I went there almost in the evening and the city was packed with tourists from all over. I recall the backyard area being filled with people, and the air was dense with past rain, and I felt awkward and out of place. The visit yesterday was much calmer. The place doesn't open until the evenings anymore.
Our short visit to Kineruku reminded me that I'm still allowed to do things for my own sake, if not now then soon. Living life for years on someone else's behalf doesn't mean things need to stay that way forever. You can choose now, you can choose today, because the time will pass regardless, and now is different from then.